What?!? I'm an adult?!?

   Seriously! When did I become an adult? It's like I looked up and BAM I'm an adult. Most days I go around doing what I do, but there are instances where I start to feel older and have "adult" moments. For instance, I filled out a survey the other day and had to enter the age category. It was a weird feeling when I found out that I am in a different category now. I was expecting that feeling at 26, not at 25. There was an 18-24 category and the 25-36 category... That felt weird. There was a moment of panic when I realized that I was no longer associated in that category. I was like "oh no! I can't be that old yet!" It was CRAZY!
   Also, there have been moments in this past year that have helped aid this. I hired a summer intern. For many years, that was my role... now I am on the other side of this... I hired a summer intern... It's crazy! It's starting to hit home that I am no longer young... but that I am an adult, in my mid-20's finishing up a Masters degree, earlier bed times, and doing adult things. It's like there was this switch, and I don't know when it happened...
  Life is crazy eh?

Life

So, this past summer I accepted a job with one of the local churches in Calgary. I am the children's pastor there. Let me tell you, this has been one steep learning curve! But it has been absolutely worth it!

A few things that I have learned:
 - Don't think that you can do it all by yourself. I learned this the hard way. I had to ask for help eventually. But when I did, it made it that much more enjoyable and less stressful!
 - I will screw things up. I will mess things up so bad that I don't think I could ever recover from! But it gets better. There are people who will help get through it and help fix things.
 - If something is going to go wrong it will. These things do not only happen by themselves...There will be many things that go wrong.
 - The children will surprise you! There will be times that these kids just astonish you with what they learn and what they remember from week to week.
 - The children will steal your heart. I've been working with these kids since the summer now and they have captured my heart. They are so precious and even if they are having a bad day, they are still cute and precious!
 - The congregation will become a part of who I am. They will become part of what I do. They will be the ones that I want to minister to. They are the ones I want to serve.
 - I can't do anything without my volunteers! These people are amazing. They are willing to do anything that's needed above and beyond what's needed. These people are what makes my ministry go!
 - I can't do anything without God. He is the one that provides the energy, the stamina, and the excitement! There is no way that I could do what I do every week without God.

This Christmas is my first Christmas play with the kids. It has also been a learning curve. There are things that I will make sure that don't happen again. I need to be better prepared for it. But it is also rewarding. The kids have been working hard and it is coming together. We perform on Sunday and things are falling into place.

This job is also everything that I have ever dreamed I would have wanted in a career. It is my calling. It is my vocation. It is what I am supposed to be doing with my life. Have you ever had when something is so right that it is amazing? Well, that is what this is!

I LOVE being a Children's Pastor!

Family.

Family. What does that word even mean? I have blood-related people who I call family, and I have family friends who I would consider family. They may not be blood-related, but they are still a large part of my "family". I also have friends who have become family. What does this word mean to you?

I figured out today that my family has not been together for a holiday in almost 2 years. No Easters, no Thanksgivings, No Christmas', no Birthdays. The last holiday my family was all together at was my nieces first Christmas, and even then it included my sister-in-law's mother and sister. Times change, families grow, and live continues. It's a hard reality to grasp when everyone in your family is going/doing something for Christmas and you are left wondering "well, what about me?" (I might go into a rant here as I write, so forgive me, I need to share my heart with someone).

I miss my family. I miss spending time together as a family. We were together a few weeks ago to help my brother and his family move to Edmonton. There were lots of other people around to help them move so I got to spend some valuable time with my nieces, but then I had to leave and go back to my life. I had to go back to work and miss being with my family that much longer. This Christmas, they are all invited somewhere else for Christmas and I am left wondering what I am going to do. I work in a church. It is kind of expected of me to be there for Christmas. I came to the realization that this will be my first Christmas without any of my family. Last year, my sister-in-law was 9 months pregnant and it wasn't safe for them to travel. The year before that, we all traveled north to visit them in their home with her side of the family. It's not a bad thing to celebrate the wonderful holiday with extended family, but I miss my family. I miss it being just the 7 of us together. I don't know what a holiday looks like with just my family. I've never experienced it. Because of school (and now work) I can't always get away for the different holidays. It sucks. I miss my family.

It's also confusing because I am still single (not that I am complaining). I don't know if there will ever be someone else's family for me to visit. I don't know if there is the possibility of being in a relationship and starting my own traditions with my own family. I just don't know.

I was blessed to spend this weekend with friends. My birthday was on Saturday and I have an amazing set of friends who spent the day with me playing games and hanging out. It was amazing. I loved it. I was also privileged to be a part of their family dinner this afternoon/evening. We were able to hang out, eat some great food, and have a great time together. I had an amazing time hanging out with her family, but it's not the same as spending the time with my family. I have been privileged to spend the last Easter, Canada Day, and this Thanksgiving with this family who have sort of 'adopted' me into their family. I love it. I get to spend time with people that I love and who have just accepted me. But it makes me miss my family even more. It makes me miss the Thanksgivings, Easters, Christmas', Birthdays. It makes me miss seeing my nieces grow. It makes me miss being with my family celebrating the different holidays. It makes me wish for more.

I miss my family, but it also makes me thankful for those who have become a part of my 'family'.

Introverts.

So I just finished reading a book for one of my classes called Introverts in the Church: Finding our place in an Extroverted Culture. This book has done a lot of validating for my vocation and in who I am. There is so much in the book that I want to share but for now, I shall leave you with this quote: "When we pursue those things we love, we delight in God and his gifts. God has engrained in all of us particular passions, drives and interests, and in pursuing them with a Godward perspective, we engage in worship."
Think on that. What is worship? It's not only just singing songs and listening to a sermon. It is so much more than that!
If you are an introvert, then this is a book I highly reccomend!

All the way my Saviour leads me.

This song really speaks to me. It describes what's going on right now and how God is working in my life right now.

All the way my Saviour leads me - Chris Tomlin

All the way my Savior leads me
Who have I to ask beside
How could I doubt His tender mercy
Who through life has been my guide

All the way my Savior leads me
Cheers each winding path I tread
Gives me grace for every trial
Feeds me with the living bread

You lead me and keep me from falling
You carry me close to Your heart
And surely Your goodness
And mercy will follow me
All the way my Savior leads me

Oh, the fullness of His love
Oh, the sureness of His promise
In the triumph of His blood

And when my spirit clothed immortal
Wings its flight to realms of day
This my song through endless ages
Jesus led me all the way
Jesus led me all the way

You lead me and keep me from falling
You carry me close to Your heart
And surely Your goodness
And mercy will follow me
You lead me and keep me from falling
You carry me close to Your heart
And surely Your goodness
And mercy will follow me, will follow me

All the way my Savior leads me
All the way my Savior leads me

Seminary Life...

So I am currently working on a lesson plan for Balaam's Donkey (Numbers 22:21-40) and thought it would be cool to do a skit... My friend pipes up and starts making up this song (sung to Yankee Doodle) that is now going to be included in my lesson plan!


Prophet Balaam went to town

Riding on the donkey

Hit the donkey on the head

and donkey started talking



Why'd you hit me on the head

Why'd you hit me Balaam

Why'd you hit me on the head

That Angel's got a sword!

(Sung to Yankee Doodle)

I LOVE SEMINARY!

Sometime's it's hard going down Memory Lane...

I went looking for a bag today. There generally is not anything special about a bag... However, this bag is special. It holds many letters and notes from friends in Edmonton! These letters remind me how loved I am and when I go back to visit, how many friends are going to want to see me. So I have now been in Calgary for 2 months. It does not feel like it has been 2 months. It feels like forever!

Where to begin... So much has happened and yet, there is still so much that is going to happen! In the last month, I have:
A) Found a home church
B) Got a job at another Oxford
C) Applied for a 'real world' job
D) Visited Elbow Falls with friends
E) Made some AMAZING new friends!
F) Met friends who will be lifelong 'family'
G) Joined the Seminary Student Council (SSC) as the PR co-ordinator
H) Made it on to another committee
I) Attending Classes
J) Had/Having my mind blown with new information in my classes
K) Having information presented in a new way where my mind becomes blown
L) Found a new small group to join
M) Celebrated my 24th birthday with friends after one of my weekend modulars
         (This was a birthday to remember!!! All I have to say is... Pictionary Man!!! LOL!!!)


This list is not exhastive, but it has been a full and exciting 2 months. God has been teaching me a lot. My classes have all changed how I view the church and what goes on in it. I find I am becoming more aware of lots of different things. I am also becoming more aware (and scared) of what I am called to do. I have realized that in Children's Ministry a lot of curriculum is watered down for the Children. I also feel like we do not give the kids enough credit. We keep telling them that they are only kids and that they don't know anything... but we are wrong. I find that sometimes, the kids can hear God better than we can because they are not constricted by social structures and views that hinder them. I find that we tell them they dont understand or know things because they are children. If you know me, this is something that I am really passionate about. I could talk for a while on this, but if you want to talk more, let's go for coffee.
One thing that scares me is that I am called to teach the Children. I keep asking and wondering how I take what I am learning and teach it to the Children. It is something that I have asked my profs, and they keep telling me to keep asking that question.
It's challenging, but what can I say, I LOVE IT!
I love Seminary! I feel like I belong in Seminary. I have made so many new friends and not just people who are just there, but friends who will be friends for life. These people have been my support and kept me sane. They are willing to go the extra mile to make me laugh and the stuff we have done... Memories have been made! :)

So, on another note... If you know much about my health in the last few years, you know that I have had a terrible time. I have had tonsilitus for the last 4 years (multiple times a year) and I am often sick. In May, I started feeling sick everytime I had dairy... So I got checked out and found that I now have a lactose intolerancy. Fine, I can deal with that. I also found out this summer that with my thyroid disease, I should not be eating a bunch of things. This list is rather long... it includes Gluten (any form of wheat products), soy products, certain vegetables, etc... SO I went from having no food allergies at all to an interesting list of DO NOT EAT foods. By God's grace, I am survivng. There is still lots I can eat, but it forces me to eat healthy so it's a good thing. I am learning how to eat gluten/soy/dairy free and most places are accomidating, and as long as I remind people when I go out, it's managable. I also have some amazing friends who try to accomidate me when we
share meals together. Have I mentioned that I love my friends? In response to all these new issues, the one thing that has been amazing is... I HAVE NOT BEEN SICK SINCE THE SUMMER!!! No tonsilitus, no colds, no flu... NOTHING!!! This is the time of year where I have been sicker than a dog. Amazing eh? Somehow, my body has been trying to tell me this for the last few years, but no one thought to check for intolerances or things that might be affecting me when ALL my tests ALWAYS came back clear... Hmmm... Some doctors eh?

God has been doing so much in these last 2 months, that it is hard to count all the blessings! I feel blessed and Loved.

I have more to share, but for now, you have to wait. There is stuff going on that I won't share about yet. If you have had a chance to talk with me, you might already know. However, in due time, you shall find out.

Prayer:
A) That God will show some discernment to those involved
B) That God will continue to bless and strengthen me as I finish this semester
C) That God will continue to teach me and show me what He has in store
D) That as I am learning, God will show up in unexpected ways
E) That I will continue to be blessed with good health.

Praise be to God for all that He has done.